Just recently I have been reading about pushy parents. This worries me. Why are they pushy? Is it for themselves? Do they want their child to succeed and be better than everyone else? Is it because the school is not providing the right learning environment for their child so they feel they have to teach them at home or get them tutored? These are all questions that matter.
Firstly the child comes first. Are they ready to read? If not then don’t even try. It is better to wait for reading readiness and it always comes. If you push it too quickly, they often rebel and then the process can take longer. When they see you reading and have access to books, the world of reading becomes exciting or challenging…but not if you still want to play Batman or greengrocers shops with your new game. Once all the playing is out of the way then we can start. A child who wants to learn is a child that will learn.
When children start to read does it matter if they are on a lower level book than the rest of the class? No…it is not our role to make our child the same as everyone else. Children learn at different rates and if yours sets off quickly the rest will catch up soon enough and if they don’t then there is help there for them. Most children end up reading anyway…does it matter how quickly or slowly? No. Why are you so bothered what level others are at? If you are then why? Your competetiveness will be noted by your child and it puts them under enormous pressure. And they feel it at five or six believe me.
I think it is best to put your child first. Think about their needs. Spending time just talking and listening to their ideas, problems, worries and opinions makes them feel like that you are interested in them. That they are part of the team. Lets face it they are because they are part of you…the only difference is they have not had so many birthdays as you.
The best advice I can give is to back off and let them learn at their own rate. Help them if they want it and ask for it. Take time. Put down the duster or the potato peeler…turn off the radio and listen to them. Believe me the times when they are little and need you are so short make the most of the, but listen to them. They may make you realise the reason why they do or don’t do things then you can work out solutions together. This works so I hope you try it.